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Valerie

I grew up believing the ideals of this country– that we are created equal and are afforded rights equally. It is so ingrained in me that even at my age, I do still believe it. I live it. But that doesn’t meant that I do not see the inequality that continues to thrive in our society because I do. And ever since the White House changed hands, the disparity of ideals has shown with alarming and disappointing consistency.

Suddenly people think that they can say horrible things and when called on it, say that they’re tired of being told to be “PC.” Since when does being a thoughtful and compassionate human being been such a bad thing? Why is it so wrong for people to believe in equality? Why shouldn’t someone doing their job expect to be compensated without regard to their race or gender? And if someone does their job, why should they be “grateful” for earning their way and being compensated for it? Also, aren’t we allowed to peaceably protest the injustice that exists in this world?

I bought into the ideals of this country and I have gone through most of my life not being openly judged as a woman or a person of color. No one has blamed me for their own misfortune. Maybe I’ve been lucky. Maybe people look at me as an Asian woman and shrug because they think I’m harmless and I know “my place.” Maybe being married to my husband gives me a pass. Or maybe I’ve been lucky enough to be around people who believe the same as I do– we are equal.

Having worked with law enforcement, I am sensitive to blanket criticism of the men and women who risk their lives daily to protect citizens. But having worked with law enforcement also means I have known men and women who were quick to resort to the “us vs. them” mentality. I fell into that mentality too. I know that most of the men and women of law enforcement are good people who believe in helping and protecting all of us just as I know there are a very very few who take the little power they have and wield like total degenerates.

The state of our world has become divisive and restless. Instead of trying to unify all of us, the current White House resident seems hellbent on ripping everything apart. And people are falling for it because perhaps we all just love being in conflict. But this kind of conflict, pitting Americans against fellow Americans, will end up destroying us. Anyone with any capacity to see the big picture can see this.

I will go on with my life believing in the ideals of this country even though there are people in this country who don’t believe I should have the same rights whether because of my gender or race or even age. I will live my life with a positive eye, looking for beauty and joy. I will acknowledge the dissonance and injustice but I will not let it sour my spirit. I will do my part to spread joy and not let the negative attitudes dissuade me. I will strive to remember it’s not “us vs. them” but rather just US. We all deserve good lives that include education, health, jobs, and freedom…

Originally published at Kiari's Corner. You can comment here or there.

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Valerie

daydreams that wander
maybe leading to something
more than wistful sighs

I’ve begun the prep work on my next National Novel Writing Month story. I know, it’s a little early, but I like to pretend to be prepared. I also like having a notebook on hand and writing when something comes to me. I’m trying to outline the plot a little as well as write in the voice of the characters. I think I’ve decided to go with the whole first person perspective, which will be a challenge but one I want to attempt. Wish me luck?

I think the interesting thing will be when I get to the steamy scenes. Those scenes are already challenging for me to write in general but to do it in the first person? And from the male perspective as well as the female? Ye gods! I hope to have enough plot points to take it to 55K to 60K words. I always want to write more than the 50K…

Originally published at Kiari's Corner. You can comment here or there.

 
 
Valerie
10 September 2017 @ 09:36 pm

do you forget
the trying times
the complications
the drawn out drama
do you forget
the selfishness
the childishness
the constant bid for attention
do you forget
the sacrifice
the lows and highs
the weakness and the strength
how do you balance
how do you honor
how do you remember

So I had a whole different post that I started yesterday but I’ve decided not to post it. I’ve only left the poem.

We visited the MIL in Auburn yesterday because we knew her time was very short. Although her eyes were open, she was not really responsive. Her breathing was labored and at times she was wheezing. She looked so different, so small and frail. I wondered if she was “there” and just unable to respond to any of us. I almost hoped that she wasn’t and that she was dreaming and seeing those who went before her. When we left, we knew it would be the last time we’d see her. She died in the early morning hours…

The best thing I can say about the MIL is that she raised a good son and for that I am ever grateful…

Originally published at Kiari's Corner. You can comment here or there.

 
 
Valerie
10 September 2017 @ 08:37 am

To my mother-in-law,

Peace now to your soul. Thank you for raising a wonderful son. I am most grateful to you for that.

Your daughter-in-law

now you are gone
with summer’s wane
the stars shone bright
when night turned morning
the dark skies waited
for one last breath
now you are gone

Filtered sunshine

Originally published at Kiari's Corner. You can comment here or there.

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Valerie
04 September 2017 @ 09:14 pm

maybe you’re waiting
amused by my wanderings
knowing I’ll return

Random musings, bullet style…

  • We’ve been watching Friends on Netflix. It’s funny and strange watching the show. Although it’s a product of its time (mostly fashions and such), the themes are still relevant. Some of the situations make me want to roll my eyes but that could just be my age showing. I was HIGHLY amused during the one episode where Joey finds the novel Rachel is reading under her bed. It’s sounds like it’s a “bodice ripper” and he is scandalized that she’s reading “porn.” It made me say aloud, “Wait, I write porn?!” (I’m sure some people might call it thusly but I don’t even consider it “erotica.”) Anyhoo, it’s been fun watching the eps I’ve caught…
  • 800 Words – It is super awesome that I’m able to watch this show! We’ve finished with the first series and we have now begun the second. Not only is it beautifully shot in a gorgeous setting, the show it well written and well acted, led by one of my favorites, Erik Thomson. I love watching his work and it’s crazy to think that I’ve been following him for close to twenty years. Where has the time gone?!…  I definitely recommend 800 Words if you have Acorn TV or live down under. Here’s an article that gives a good rundown: Why You Should be Watching the New Zealand drama 800 Words
  • The weather has been hot, much too hot. It’s suppose to cool down this week. Fingers crossed!

Erik Thomson on 800 Words
Erik Thomson on 800 Words

Originally published at Kiari's Corner. You can comment here or there.

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Valerie

stillness cools the air
as the sun seems to retreat
from upturned gazes

a version of the eclipse

I really dug the eclipse on Monday. I was oddly excited about it and I was reminded that long ago I wanted to be an astronomer. If I had kept my head in the science and math game, I probably would have done it. Ah well…

Random stuff:

  • I was off sick for three days. Kind of a bummer. Started with a stomach thing then it turned into a fever and achy body.  So I stayed home and watched a lot of tv.
  • Game of Thrones – The last episode of the season aired tonight. So how long do we have to wait until the last season?!
  • We’re trying out Acorn TV. I’m going watch 800 Words! Maybe I’ll be inspired to do some screencaps of Erik Thomson. Hmmm…
  • I need to read more…
  • Looks like this upcoming week is going to be hot. I’m already tired of this hot weather…

Originally published at Kiari's Corner. You can comment here or there.

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Valerie

staring back at me
untold possibilities
if I just let go

It’s so strange. During the week, I have all these blog worthy thoughts whirling through my head but when I actually sit down to write the post, all of the ideas just flee from me. Should I take notes during the week? Should I sneak moments to write bits and pieces then just post at the end of the week? I really don’t know.

So let’s go with bullet style musings of the random nature…

  • Simon Kassianides keeps posting toddler of pictures of himself on Instagram. SO DAMN CUTE!!! First of all, he was, as my dad likes to say, HEALTHY as a wee one. I bet he got his cheeks pinched and kissed ALL THE TIME. Second, what a serious little one he was. He was mean mugging from the get-go, eh? Lastly, little Simon was a bit of an exhibitionist and proud of it. Also, he had awesome hair. I hope he keeps posting those shots because they are DELIGHTFUL.
  • I woke up with the hubby yesterday morning at just after 2:30 AM so that I could be awake to watch my All Blacks play the Wallabies at 3:00 AM. The All Blacks made it worth my while! They had a fantastic first half. The could have done a bit better for the second half but I shouldn’t complain since the All Blacks defeated the Wallabies. Yah!
  • Game of Thrones – Is there really only one more episode?! The penultimate episode was a doozy! I was seriously yelling at the tv at certain parts and then wanting to cry at other parts. I don’t want it to end! I don’t want to have to wait a year or whatever for the final season.
  • The Hitman’s Bodyguard – I enjoyed this movie! In spite of the predictable plot points, I thought it was well done from the acting to the action to the humor. I’d definitely recommend it.
  • Tomorrow is the solar eclipse! I was watching the twit.tv shows and one of the shows had photographer Scott Bourne on it and he suggested taking pictures of everything else instead of the the actual eclipse. Since I don’t have a camera capable of taking pictures of the sun, I thought how interesting it would be to take pictures of the ordinary stuff– the landscape, the shadows, the sky in such an odd light. So that’s my goal tomorrow. I have to work but I’ll sneak outside for some shots, especially at the height of it all (which is at about quarter after ten, I believe).
  • I’m already starting to think of my November novel. I’m very likely going to write another romance story but I’m wondering if I should change things up a bit. Maybe change point of view? As an experiment, I started writing a story in the first person. Not sure how I like it yet. We’ll see when I get to the male point of view…

During my lunch break
one day during my lunch break…

Originally published at Kiari's Corner. You can comment here or there.

 
 
Valerie

SOOO many August birthdays! So many family ones and even a few of the fellas (I’m thinking of Mark Mulder, Simon Kassianides, Charles Mesure)! It’s always an interesting time of the year trying to remember everyone’s birthdays. 🙂 And looks like the latest baby was just born the other day. Welcome to the world Lilyana!

Philip Winchester in Chicago Justic

Random stuff in bullet form…

  • Philip Winchester will be back as Peter Stone, this time recurring on Law and Order: SVU. So glad he’ll be back! But wait, now this means I must watch L&O:SVU?! Oh bother. (Not really. Anything for Philip Winchester!)
  • Last week’s Game of Thrones was OFF THE HOOK. When it ended, my mouth was open and I was just blown away. This week’s episode was a bit more calming but still had moments that made me squeak a little. Like the part of the annulment? YE GODS! (Did anyone else catch that?!)
  • Sam Hunt was here this weekend and I did NOT see him. I keep saying it and I do mean it– I am not at all heartbroken about not seeing him. Would I have loved it? Hell yes! But do I feel like I missed something by not seeing him? Not really, not like I would have a year ago or two years ago. After seeing Jacob Davis two weeks ago and Tyler just a little over a week ago, I think my fangirl needs have been met for the time being. So yeah, I’m cool with not seeing Sam. I’m sure he had great shows while he was here…

REAL LIFE STUFF

My social media feed was rife with the news from Charlottesville, VA this weekend. It SICKENS me, the hate spewed crap that is out there. Those people were Nazis with their salutes and chants and symbols on their clothes and paraphernalia. True Americans should be outraged and disgusted by such displays of hate. Have we all forgotten history? It wasn’t that long ago. My grandfather fought in the second World War. My husband’s grandfather was at Normandy. They fought against the very ideals those young men (young men, WTH?!) were marching for in Charlottesville. Who do they imagine is taking their country from them? Why are they filled with such hate for others? And don’t tell me they are Christian because the God that I studied and prayed to WEEPS at such evil. And all the other gods currently worshipped do not espouse such actions.  The good, true souls out there who take the base lesson of any religion– love and harmony and truth– are all horrified by the increasing tide of hate.

It’s utterly exhausting to keep reading about all of this. So when I post those short twitter bits, I mostly stay in my moment and my sunshine and joy. I’m still breathing and I will always seek the beauty of the moment even in the face of darkness. But don’t think I’m unaware of the darkness. I just refuse to let it break me…

The end is near for someone in our lives. It’s sad yet inevitable but it’s still not an easy time. It makes me think of the measure of a person’s life and how one is remembered…

 

Originally published at Kiari's Corner. You can comment here or there.

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Valerie

I am so behind on finishing up my report on meeting Jacob and the boys last week and now I have my Grass Valley adventures to tell! Short version, bullet style!

  • We stayed at the Sierra Mountain Inn and it was comfortable and clean and I actually liked it very much.  We had a small room but it was big enough for our short stay and everything worked as it should. It’s funny having a regular key instead of the key cards hotels use.
  • It was GREAT hanging out with my fellow Rich’s Bi$ches Joanne (and her daughter Kiersten), Tracy, and Hayley. We all walked together to the venue (which was a short walk from the inn) and stood  right up to the stage during show. Front row standing, yes!
  • Tyler and his band were GREAT! They had a lot of energy and the music was fantastic! It was crazy cool having Tyler so close while performing. He was so good! The venue was intimate and there was a good size standing area in front of the stage. Loved it! I want to hear all the new songs again and I hope they’re on his upcoming album.
  • We got to see Tyler before and after the show in the green room. Probably the first and only time I’ll ever be in a green room. Ha! It was AWESOME! I got to formally meet the band and chat with them a bit. Next time I see them, I’ll probably take pictures with them. I felt a little shy doing that when I was just meeting them. They were great, easy-going, and approachable. All very talented fellas. Hope to see them all again soon.

Tyler on stage
Tyler on stage

I shall have more to tell later!

Originally published at Kiari's Corner. You can comment here or there.

 
 
Valerie
31 July 2017 @ 09:07 pm

I had an awesome Sunday at the Garlic Festival in Gilroy but I’m working on my report so here’s the short version, bullet style!

  • I FINALLY met Jacob Davis and it was so worth the wait! He’s amazing and sweet and wonderful and if it’s possible, I adore him more than I did before we met.
  • The cohorts are awesome! I’m so glad I got to also meet Teddy, Babs, Caleb, and Justin. They knew me by name (well, not sure about Justin) and greeted me like an old friend. How stoked was I?
  • Jacob’s set was high energy and so good! Loved everything about it and they all impressed me so much. Justin is SO COOL on guitar.
  • Got a setlist (thank you Justin and Caleb!), which I of course got signed by all the boys. I’m going to have to have that framed!
  • Loved taking pictures with all the boys and I especially LOVE our group shot. I loved being able to chat with the guys and it was easy.
  • Carly Pearce, who played before Jacob, was so good! I’m a new fan now!

the set list

I will share more later!

Originally published at Kiari's Corner. You can comment here or there.

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Valerie

the stir of the soul
where dreams unleash the secret
harbored in the heart

So much San Diego Comic Con envy right now!!! I wish I could just ignore all the convention goodness but I can’t. Let’s see, who did I miss at Comic Con? Aleks Paunovic, Simon Kassianides, Karl Urban, Jensen Ackles, Ryan Gosling, Chris Hemsworth, Jeffrey Dean Morgan, the Justice League cast (but no Henry, alas), and all the trailers for different movies and tv shows. But really, I would have really just loved to have been there to see like two things. Any two things as long as one of them was Simon. Ah well, this happens almost every year, especially since I follow a lot of the different actors who could appear there. I think liking so many different people would make me easy to please. Next year?

MOVIES
Dunkirk – What an excellent movie! I watched it in 2D IMAX (not sure if it was 70mm) and it was amazing. Yes, Tom Hardy was the draw for me but I think I would have liked the movie if someone else played his character. Maybe. Actually, he was mesmerizing as the Spitfire pilot Farrier, conveying emotion and purpose in such a small space and few words. I would definitely recommend the movie, especially if you can watch it in 70 mm…

Unforgettable – The movie came out in digital HD this week and OF COURSE I had to buy it (at a discount courtesy of the T-Mobile Tuesday Vudu credit). We watched it the other night. I’m sure it’s not a surprise that the real draw for me was Simon’s one scene.

Simon in Unforgettable

His character, Michael, is only in one full scene but his presence is felt throughout the film. He played him convincingly and was definitely not a good guy. Not sure he quite deserved the end he got but such was the movie…

Unforgettable

TV
Game of Thrones – The only other show that I watch “live” is Game of Thrones (the other being Blindspot) and it’s always so worth it! The season opener was last week and I just finished this week’s episode. Both so good! I really enjoy the show and I think I like that the show has gone past the books. It’ll make the new books interesting reads (whenever they come along).

BABBLE HERE AND BABBLE THERE

I am digging the Prisma app, especially with my self portraits. It feels vain, posting the filtered selfies, but it’s fun so I just go with it… My new pieces from 1888 Design arrived this week. I love them!… When Dunkirk started, Simon was moderating a panel at San Diego Comic Con. Yes, I actually thought of that while I was at the movie theatre… The first day of school is coming fast upon us. It makes me sad how short our summer breaks are… I had to buy reading glasses the other day. I think they could help me. I bought a three pack so I’ll bring a pair to work…

Simon Kassianides

Originally published at Kiari's Corner. You can comment here or there.

 
 
Valerie

Oh no, I’m late with this entry! To be fair, I did post something for Tyler and Sabina because I am SAPPY as hell and I do adore them as separate people and as a couple and I just wanted them to know since I have no idea next time I’ll see them. The post was meant for them and not technically a TWITL post so here I am again, a little late…

LOVE
When I found out Tyler and Sabina got engaged, I was SO HAPPY for them. They are genuinely good people and as a couple they are sweet and fun and adorable and so obviously in love. My romantic heart just finds the story of their love just touching and sweet. Plus I really just like them so much. I like thinking we were there to witness their beginning…

MOVIES
War for the Planet of the Apes – I totally planned to watch this movie the moment I took over the Cuddle Puddle Nation twitter account. I knew that I had to be supportive in any way I could for opening weekend and so I caught up on the previous two Apes movies and was ready to go for this third (last?) installment. This last movie was strong and gut wrenching and heartbreaking. I loved it. I loved how strongly I felt for all the characters, primates and humans alike. It was the right end for the whole story arc but it was still so heartbreaking. I’d definitely recommend it! Aleks Paunovic (Winter) made the most of his time on-screen and I would have loved to have seen more of him…

FANGIRL MUSINGS
So Simon will be at Comic Con on Saturday. He’s moderating a panel. I WISH I COULD BE THERE! Seriously, when am I going to meet this guy? It could totally happen. Or maybe I’ll get to the point where I don’t care if I meet him or not. I’m not there yet. Shoot, I’m not there yet with even Sully or Henry or Sam. I still want to meet all of them too! Right now, it’s all focused on Simon. I really can’t explain it.

Simon on Smooch
Simon on Smooch

Unforgettable comes out on digital this week and I am probably going to buy it… I wish I could find some of Simon’s other works. After all, how many times can I watch the second season of Agents of SHIELD?

Originally published at Kiari's Corner. You can comment here or there.

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Valerie

Dear Tyler & Sabina,

Congratulations! I hope someday soon to give you both big hugs but for now I must take a moment to say how much I adore and love the both of you and how the news of your engagement just warms my heart. I AM SO HAPPY FOR THE TWO OF YOU!

Tyler, you have always been wonderful and I have treasured every moment watching you sing and play. Your music hooked me but the fact that you are an awesome man, generous and gracious, just puts you over the top. You will ALWAYS be one of my favorites. When Sabina came into your life, your heart just opened even more. Something unlocked in you and we could all feel it. Well, I could. You were always friendly but after Sabina, there was something more. Her warm spirit combined with yours and you bloomed. Wait, can men bloom? Let’s go with it. You bloomed and it can’t be a coincidence that everything about you shone brighter. Love does that to you and it definitely suits you.

Sabina, you are one of the loveliest, sweetest ladies I have ever met and I couldn’t help liking you from the very first. The absolute glow on your face as you watched Tyler sing and play just made me adore you. And the fact that you are such a sweetheart means you have as much a place in my heart as Tyler does. You are a generous and gracious soul and love just makes you shine.

Tyler & Sabina, many congratulations on your engagement and here’s to a lifetime together of love and laughter and everything in between!

With love,
Valerie

with Tyler & Sabina

Originally published at Kiari's Corner. You can comment here or there.

 
 
Valerie

when I close my eyes
the dreams begin their magic
calling me to you

beer

It has been an awesome week off from work. First off all, I was off from work. JOY! This meant waking up when I wanted (mostly) and being even lazier than usual (although I did do lots of laundry). Second, the weather was mostly cooperative by not being totally sizzling. We still had to use the a/c but it was rather manageable if we stepped out. Third, we got to spend time with family on the 4th of July, which is always fun!

4TH OF JULY
4th of July
our 4th of July

Our day started early because we wanted to watch the first 4th of July Parade here in Brentwood. I woke up to an alarm (what?!), got ready, then we walked over to one of locals. I had a Bloody Mary then stepped outside to watch most of the parade from the sidewalk. It was fun! It was also pretty damn warm for just after 9AM and I eventually watched the end of the parade from my seat at the bar because I had to finish my drink and I wanted to enjoy the a/c.

After a nap (yes, a NAP), we headed out to Pleasant Hill for dinner and fireworks at my cousin’s house. Good food, great company, and pretty cool fireworks. It’s always great to get together with everyone to just relax and talk and eat. I like the eating part. Ha! The fireworks were fun. I probably should have worn jeans or something because I got bit by mosquitoes. Bah!

#CUDDLEMASTER
I know, what the heck is Cuddle Master? Well, it goes like this– I’m part of the Cuddle Puddle Nation (@CuddlePuddleNtn – twitter), a group of fans who love and adore actor Aleks Paunovic. The owner of the twitter account decided it was time to let go of the account and I volunteered to take the mantle. It’s not a responsibility I take lightly. Aleks deserves the time and attention and I hope my efforts are worthy to the task. I have befriended some awesome folks online because of him and that is a gift to cherish. As daunting as it could be, I go with love and respect not just for Aleks but for my fellow fans as well.

So says the new Cuddle Master!

[insert giggles here]

TRIVIA NIGHT
Hubby finally convinced me to got to Trivia Night at his favorite bar on Thursday night. We walked on a hot early evening first to dinner then to the bar. We won! Huzzah! We probably could have racked more points if I had gone with my gut in the one round to guess the theme (which was Sherlock Holmes). As winners we got a free round of drinks. I went with a triple IPA… After trivia, we headed to our other favorite bar for more drinks and live music with Ben Benkert. We liked him so much we bought his CD.

a cold drink

LAST BABBLE

probably my Man Crush Monday pic…

Drives me CRAZY when I start on a new fella and I can’t find his previous work, especially when I want to watch that particular work. Case in point– Simon posted a picture of himself in one of his previous roles and when I tried to find the movie, no joy! Where can I find it?! Who do I need to ask? I found the trailer and OF COURSE I did some screenshots. They’re right up there in that funny little collage. I’m going to use it for my Man Crush Monday post tomorrow, I think…

My stories are so maddeningly stalled. I don’t want to force anything and yet I do because I feel that I should just write until I get over this pause. It’s just super frustrating! I want to do the stories justice but even just trying to concentrate on ONE seems so daunting…

We watched the Planet of the Apes movies because I intend on actually going to the theatre to watch War of the Planet of the Apes. Aleks is in it so must be supportive. 😉

Originally published at Kiari's Corner. You can comment here or there.

 
 
Valerie
03 July 2017 @ 11:46 am

the beat of your heart
echoes much too far from me
yet I feel its call

my work crew
my work crew

I’m off of work for a week! Such a wonderful thing. So far it’s been lazy times but that’s all right, eh?

WRITING
I am at that pause in my writing. I keep re-reading my unfinished stories and as much as I want to finish them, I just can’t muster the creative energy for them. Alas! It’s not that I don’t love my characters– I do– but they’re waiting just like I am…

MUSIC
More songs added to my playlist!

  • “You Broke Up with Me” – Walker Hayes – This one is a fun toe tapper! I like the groove of it. It reminds me of another song (but can’t think of which one). It’s cute and a great summer song…
  • “All on Me” – Devin Dawson – I kept hearing this song on the radio (yes, I listen to the radio sometimes still) and I finally pulled the trigger on it. There’s an R&B feel to it that just appeals to me. Definitely a cool summer song.
  • “I’m Gonna Love You” – Murphy Elmore – I heard a live version of this song and I just had to have it. It’s from an EP released a year ago. I love the sexy songs that just reach deep inside of you and this one does it.
  • “Love Someone” and “Castaway” – Brett Eldredge – I pre-ordered Brett’s upcoming album and these two songs are available now. I don’t normally pre-order anything but he’s one of my very few exceptions, apparently.  “Castaway” is an intimate song and I love the stripped down beauty of it. “Love Someone” is still working on me but I like it enough so far.

FANGIRL MUSINGS
Videochatted with two of my friends regarding our fan accounts. It was great catching up with them in real time. We’re trying to figure out how and what we want to do to promote our favorite. We need to be more organized and perhaps more centralized. The three of us concentrate on different social accounts (I think they do so much more than I do, I definitely need to step up more!) and we have a rather tenuous link to our favorite. My thoughts are we need to figure out what HE wants and how hands on he wants to be with us. Maybe he likes the distance. Maybe he’s not sure he can trust us. Maybe he needs to take baby steps. As his fans, we want to promote his work, maybe give a glimpse of him as a person, and be an example of good will and support for him. We also want to keep up interest in him even when he’s not currently working, like right now!…

I’m in the weird paranoid stage with my number one. You know, the one where you keep thinking, “Did I do something wrong?” because you’re not getting the responses that you previously received? I’m right there. I shouldn’t care about getting any kind of response from him, right? I mean, it’s not like he even knows me at all. I should be satisfied with just his posts and such. So what if he doesn’t respond to me at all. Wait, that’s not quite right. He does like my comments sometimes. He’s so random. I should just let that sink in and be happy with it. I know I’ll get over this whole weird stage. I just don’t want to fall out of it with him, you know? I like having someone new to fangirl over. Maybe he’s weirded out that someone is fangirling over him…

I oftentimes miss the Xena/Hercules days. Such wonderful memories of hanging out with my friends and meeting our favorites from both the shows. Making those connections– between fellow fans and between the actors– was one of the best things ever! I miss the chats I used to have with one of the actors from the show who’s still a favorite of mine. It warms my heart that a couple of the actors still remember me and are always so kind in our current interactions. Just makes me want to see them again! (Or finally meet them, as is the case with one of them.) I’m glad I wrote decent convention reports at least…

KSOFC Brunch 1998
The goofiest picture of me and Kevin Smith (“Ares” on Xena/Herc) back in 1998

I still miss Kev. I often wonder where he would be if he were still alive. Would the whole world know about him? Would he have stayed in New Zealand for television? Would he have landed more movie parts? It still squeezes my heart that he’s not in the world anymore. Such an amazing talent and such a gracious man…

Originally published at Kiari's Corner. You can comment here or there.

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